The vast majority of society seeks approval or validation from others. We learn at a young age to occassionally look up at mom and dad, waiting for that nod or smile to show that what we are doing is ok. As we grow we look to teachers for praise. Once we are adults we need to be told we are doing well at work and we even look to social media for likes and comments. All of these are forms of validation and approval.
Read MoreWe are all a part of a great tapestry and when you weave us together we become one, which is the key to Samadhi, or ultimate enlightenment. When we think of tantra we typically associate it with tantric sex. Our society, as a whole, would like us to believe that sex outside of the intent to recreate is dirty or taboo. But sex is truly a beautiful act between two people in love and during which they literally reach the highest state of becoming one with each other.
Photography by Libby McAvoy
So what prompted this blog? Well, I am currently reading, “The Book of Secrets” by Osho. It is a very long, information packed, deep book. But I am learning a lot about tantra and why it is often related to love and sex. In a society where sadly we are flooded with mental health issues, depair, and violence we need to rejoice in respectful SEX and in LOVE because the world needs more peace. Ok, so according to The Book of Secrets, “the word tantra means technique, the method, the path.” This is different from philosophy that has us asking “why” in that tantra is a science that looks at and shows us “how” so we can answer our own questions through life experiences. We cannot seek answers outside of us and we all tend to lend advice where we ourselves do not heed that same advice. According to Osho, “Tantra will give us a technique to attain answers.”
I have spoken many times about the importance of breath, but Osho explains it as each exhale being a moment of death and each inhale being a moment of rebirth. So, when we understand this we can find strength in knowing that with each breath we take is a chance to start anew. At the center of our being lies our heart. Love is ultimately the link between us and the divine. There is no separation. When two people are deeply in love there is also no separation. When those two people share the act of intercourse, and during intercourse, they remain still without words and momentarity they become sex, they become love, and it is no longer an action but a transcendence which is why tantra is often seen through tantraic sex. But it is more than sex. It is a divine union that takes us to a place of utimate bliss.
We have to allow every situation to be. Tantra explains the importance of acceptance. We need to surrender rather than suppress our emotions and undertsanding. Sometimes, especially during times of unrest, we cannot possibly undertsand the “whys” and we have to simply surrender and sit with it. In my own city of Cincinnati, we just experienced a tragedy as a gunman opened fire in our Fountain Square and Fifth Third Banking Headquarter building. Unfortunately three innocent people lost their lives and two others remain hospitalized. It is in these tragic and difficult times that we all search for answers and understanding. But we have to simply accept what is. There are metally ill people, people who make grave mistakes, and terrorists, but Tantra explains that there is no division between good and bad. No one is a bad person, but some people do bad things. It is in these times that we are challenged the most. We must forgive, which is incredibly difficult, but holding grudges only hurts us more in the long run. This goes for all challenges that we face. Religion is fear based where spiritality is love based. Love conquers all. So be love, give love, and most importantly practice self love.
So love more, enjoy tantric or long unspoken intimate sex with your life partner, and practice awareness, acceptance, and forgiveness each and every day. We are never promised tomorrows so we need to make the most of each day. Rise up to your greatest potential. Great things are coming. Accept what is and have faith in what will be.
Lovingly,
Libby
P.S. - Please stay tuned for our blog Tuesday by Paul Garret, which will honor and pay tribute to all who lost loved ones on 911 and in any tragic event.
New Posts Every Tuesday and Saturday
It's that time of year again for my fellow mom and dads, school teachers and coaches and students of all ages. Summer seems to fly by ever so quickly these days. Now it's back to school shopping and preparations while still trying to soak up the last of summer time fun. This year is different for me though. I would like to share with you some intimate details about what is happening in my life in hopes that you can either share advice or similar experiences with me. Well, I feel like I blinked and she went from diapers to preparing for college. My daughter has been a true gem her entire life and I have enjoyed every minute of the journey, but now is the time that I have to trust that her father and I have prepared her for being a responsible adult in this world. I will be driving her down to move into her dorm at University of Kentucky (UK) this Friday.
Go Wildcats! Photography by Libby McAvoy
Oh boy does saying that bring a rush of emotions to my head and to my heart. I sit here typing with tears welling up in my eyes. I am beyond happy and excited for her next leg of this journey. I believe deeply that Morgan will accomplish her greatest dreams and be a successful student. She will be in the College of Agriculture with an undergraduate in animal sciences hoping to go on to Vet School. Needless to say this life transition brings with it uncertainty. Morgan is nervous as well as excited, but will miss her family, friends and pets. I am sad to “lose” my daughter and quite frankly best friend. I am scared for the experiences that will bring her challenges and heartaches, dissapointments and fears, but that all comes with growing up. I know that she will learn by leaps and bounds and excel. And I, of course, am looking forward to her visit home for Thanksgiving, the phone calls and the many text between us.
So many proud achievements over the past four years.
For those of us who are sending a child away for the first time this year, UK did a phenominal job in their parent orientation sharing ideas that help students excel. They explained to us parents that sending a text before big exams or papers are due and calling after to see how it went really helps students (our children) feel that we are there with them in spirit. He also said that small care packages from home are well always received. I have taken notes and plan to stay close to her even from a distance.
Bonding time hiking with my son at Red River Gorge.
This transition also brings change for my son. Corwin is entering 8th grade this year. Having his sister away from home brings great changes to him in multiple ways. He is used to her driving him places and they are very close. It is a great way to teach him that our love for people does not change because of the distance between us. He is looking forward to having special visits with his sister without his parents around too, especially for a basketball game. But as he too goes back to school I am also excited that I will now have more time with him. This is a very important year for Corwin as he prepares for high school next year. Being the second child sometimes means taking a back seat or not having things be new and as special for him. But, at least he knows I will do drivers ed a little better when it's his turn and his sister definitely paved a good path for him. I also look forward to making special memories with Corwin while Morgan is away.
Some parents cannot wait for school to resume. I have never felt this way. I love time spent with my kids and the relaxed schedule of summer. However, I am excited to finish projects of my own including my upcoming book about stress. I believe that although we are parents, it is also important to remember our own unique identity and purpose. Using my positive thinking I am excited to dedicate more time to organizing, updating a couple rooms at home, and getting back to a more disciplined routine of working out.
Celebrating Graduation with Family and friends.
Although transitions do bring uncertainties, it is important to embrace them as we have discussed in our latest blog series. Uncertainties, such as the transitions back to school, also bring new opportunities, positive changes, unlimited possibilities and growth. Now is the time. Get excited if you to are in this season of change with me. It is time to give our children wings and launch them lovingly into a new level in their lives. Of course, being the energetic beings that we are, as they launch into new begininings we too follow. Life is exciting. Let’s see what this amazing school year brings to us all.
Peace and encouragement,
Libby
P.S. - For those parents who have been through college transitions or have moved children away from home, I would love to invite you to share ways to communicate anything that helped your child or yourself. You can comment in the box below or on our latest post on Instagram.
New Posts Every Tuesday and Saturday
What holds us back from accomplishing all of our dreams? In most cases it is simply the confines of our own minds, which are too often ruled by fear. There is the fear of failure and the fear of getting hurt, but the biggest innate one for us subconciously is the fear of death. Let's face it, fear of the unknown comes with the thought of death. Where will our spirit go? Will we go to heaven or hell? What is heaven really like anyway? Have you ever found yourself asking these or similar questions? Death is truly a part of life. After all the only thing that we know for certain is that someday we will die.
Photography By Libby McAvoy
As I sit on my airplane looking out the window at the fluffy beautiful clouds I am reminded of wondering as a child what it would be like to hop playfully from one cloud to the next. I clearly remember pondering how much I would sink in or if I would fall through the bottom of the clouds. These inquisitive thoughts are symbollic because I pictured myself going to heaven after death on earth. I thought that is what it would be like; I woud just live “up there.” As an adult I realize that clouds are impervious or unaffected by us. I have even driven right through them in the mountains of Tennessee. So, what does that mean? I guess I will never get to bounce on them, they have no soft fluffy texture that I once thought.
The mind is powerful. Things are not always as they seem. The most important thing we can do is to think positively and attract positive outcomes. When we live in fear we are not making the most of this beautiful life we have been given. Yes, we will die someday, but many of us are never fully living to begin with because of fears that hold us back. Go after your dreams, believe that you deserve happiness because you do. Make the most of everyday and ask yourself the folloing questions:
Photography by Libby McAvoy
I am currently reading "The Daily Stoic Journal", which encourages daily journaling. Each day the book poses a new question and I am guided to focus my awareness on that particular thought and then write about it. It is amazing how much clarity this process is bringing me. It is helping me understand myself better. We are each unique beings, but at our core we are all the same meaning we are divine beings, yes all of us. No one is bad we just make poor decisions sometimes, some more than others. So I no longer believe in heaven or hell. I do not know where our souls go when our bodies perish, but I am letting go of fear. I am changing the direction of my thoughts to start living each day. I am letting go.
Feeling like a road warrior (warrior two pose) in Kentucky.
Let go and simply live, love and laugh. Yes, we might get hurt, but we might not. We never know unless we try. So, have faith and stick with positive thoughts! As Paul so eloquently wrote about dealing with uncertainties in life in his last blog, embrace those uncertainties and allow life to bring you beautiful surprises.
Peace and Light,
Libby
P.S. - If you enjoyed this blog, please click on the "Likes" button or leave a comment below. We love hearing from you! You can also connect with us on Instagram; @libbymcavoy @thepaulgarrett @totalsoulfuljourney
New Posts Every Tuesday and Saturday
Vacation travel allows for expansion. Whether you prefer beaches or mountains is irrelevant. What really matters is taking time out to gain new perspectives, renew our energy and enjoy our lives. We all love to dream of our escapes. Some of us travel more than others. Some travel great distances and others stay close to home. The important lesson is to travel not to escape daily life, but to enhance it! Vacation allows us quality time where we can build lasting memories with friends and family. Yes, we love to capture moments by camera to share with others, but be mindful to stay fully present and not get pulled into social media for too long.
Read MoreParenting is both the greatest gift and experience life can offer to many, but it is also the most difficult. It does not come with an owner's manual or certainty for success. It is an unknown world. Once you have multiple children you tend to ease up a little and feel a little more in control, but with more children come more responsibilities and pressure. The sound of a child's laughter coud melt your heart as it warms you completely. Many times we wish we could bottle that sound because it speaks of innocence, lightness and divine love.
Read MoreThis seems like a straight forward question, right? Yet, many of you reading this will struggle to answer it. You might give me responses that refer to your title or the "contracts" that you signed long before you were born, such as I am a strong compassionate woman, a mom, a daughter and a yoga instructor. Those would be my superficial answers. However, what I am really asking is what is your life’s purpose? Some may be fortunate to have the answer and be pursuing their life's purpose, yet others struggle to even know what they are passionate about.
Read MoreThe relationship that we have with ourself is the most important relationship in our life. Furthermore, how we feel about ourselves impacts the closet people around us. One of the biggest things that affects most of us is anxiety. This is particularly true right now due to the troubling events that are happening around the world these days. Anxiety is a form of stress that generally stems from overthinking. This is especially true if we are focusing on an uncertain future, rehashing traumatic or unpleasant events from the past, or comparing ourselves to others, like we often do when we spend time on social media. We all experience anxiety to one extent or another, but that doesn’t mean that we have to live with it all of the time.
Read MoreThere are subtleties in the language men vs women use in comunicating with one another. But it is not as divergent as in “men are from mars and women are from venus.” We are actually more similar than you might think. Communication includes words spoken, tone, posture, micro-gestures and the ability to listen. Men and women possess both male and female qualities (read about them in our last post), which allow us to connect on a deeper level. We all can be nurturing, sentimental and also aggressive. Sometimes it is not the words spoken, but instead how we translate what is said to us that creates our reactions. By understanding our different communication styles, we can have healthier relationships.
Read MoreWhy is it that we tend to judge by appearance before we even know a person or the kind of day they are having? There are outward behaviors that tell us a little about a person on the surface such as cleanliness, being on time/early/late and mood or verbal expression.
Read MoreMany people are intimidated by meditation because they associate it with quieting the busy mind, which can be difficult at first. But meditation by definition is, “a written or spoken discourse expressing thoughts on a subject. Musing. Concentration. Reflection. Pondering” (source: Google Dictionary). So, when we think of it like this rather than trying to stop thinking altogether, meditation becomes much more approachable. What we resist will always persist. Allow the process and trust that the results of meditation will be worth the effort.
Read MoreWe are all human and none of us are perfect. We all have flaws and fears. We also all possess the ability to love fiercely. What is it about vulnerability that scares us and makes us feel weak? Being Vulnerable means loving and accepting ourselves, admitting to times when we are wrong or make a mistake, accepting and acknowledging our weakness in order to grow, and forgiving ourselves and others.
Read MoreWords can be forgiven, but they are never forgotten. Tone is equally important. Not speaking or saying loving supportive words is also damaging and neglectful. To effectively communicate with others we must also be good listeners.
Read MoreWho am I? You are the Universe and The Universe is YOU. To trust the Universe you only have to trust yourself because you are one and the same. The Universe is not some external factor happening to you. We are all energy, perhaps made of stardust. We are souls temporarily living in these physical bodies.
Read MoreTOP TEN TIPS FOR TRANSFORMING YOUR LIFE - TIP 8
Just as the trees shed their leaves and go dormant each fall, it is very important that we allow our bodies and our minds a season of rest. Winter is a great time for reflection and contemplation and a time to slow down in preparation for our spring revival. In the Ashtanga Yoga world we practice the Yamas & Niyamas as part of the 8 limbs of yoga, which help us live our yoga off the mat in addition to the physical practice of the postures on the mat. The Yama, Aparigraha, teaches us the art of non possessiveness and in a deeper sense of letting go. We must let go of what no longer serves our highest purpose in order to make room for growth to propel us toward our greatest destiny.
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Total Soulful Journey is a inspiring blog about living your best life through awareness, acceptance and forgiveness with the goal of elevating our minds, our bodies and our spirits to their fullest potential. This blog will help people find their purpose in life and fulfill the calling of their souls through mindfulness. We'll explore the many aspects of love, health, fitness, yoga, nutrition, cooking, careers, entrepreneurship, travel, and manifesting abundance. Awaken with us on a Total Soulful Journey to becoming the best version of you!
Total Soulful Journey is an inspiring blog about living your best life by Paul Garrett. Paul is a writer, an award winning filmmaker, an internationally published photographer and an entrepreneur who lives and thrives in the Pacific Northwest.
