A Balancing Act... The Masculine and Feminine Energies Within Us

Understanding Our Masculine and Feminine Energies

We all have masculine and feminine energies within us no matter what our physical gender may be. These energies empower and influence us with an array of contrasting traits. Having these duel energies within allows us to recognize the mirrors of attraction within our potential mates, bringing the male-female connection into a relatable place. When we recognize our qualities within another person, we connect with them. If we did not share these traits to some extent, it would be more difficult to connect, merge and find commonality. Like magnets we are energetically attracted to our polar opposites, as well, and together we find a balance of swirling energy and emotions that lift us up and give us a feeling of being complete. One of the keys to a Total Soulful Journey is knowing how to balance, embrace and honor these energies within ourselves and with each other.

Let’s break them down:

Growing up, boys are teased and shamed for expressing their feminine energies. This is why boys learn from an early age to hide their emotions. Girls, on the other hand, are commonly discouraged from being assertive or forceful. As a result they find it safer to take on passive roles in life. While certain aspects of our gender roles make sense, being culturally shamed for being in touch with our opposing energies is not a healthy thing.

Men who balance their strength with a sensitivity for others have more meaningful relationships.  Photography by Paul Garrett

Men who balance their strength with a sensitivity for others have more meaningful relationships.  Photography by Paul Garrett

Why This Matters to Men

Men who shun their feminine energy tend to have difficulty processing their emotions and relating emotionally in their relationships with women. I’ve often heard women say that their spouse is a good provider, but his absence of emotions leaves them feeling distant and lonely. This is also a problem for men, because unprocessed emotions can lead to serious health problems, including heart disease and cancer. On the other hand, a man who is in touch with his masculine and feminine energies can be both strong and tender for his family. By having the fortitude to share his emotions and be in touch with his partner’s emotional needs, real communication and deeper intimacy can take place. In addition, a man who learns how to tap into his intuition can also enhance his analytical abilities to increase his success. Men who only display their masculine traits can be quicker to anger and prone to violence. This is what is referred to as hyper masculinity. 

Libby shows that women can be both strong and feminine.  Photography by Paul Garrett

Libby shows that women can be both strong and feminine.  Photography by Paul Garrett

Why This Matters to Women

Women who do not honor their masculine energy can be hesitant to speak up for their needs and desires. Being too passive can lead to a feeling of helplessness. This can have a very negative impact upon intimacy in a relationship due to the resentments that typically form and grow when one does not speak their truth with their partner. By tapping into her masculine energy, a women can be more assertive and decisive. The key once again is to find a healthy balance between both the female and male energies. This is important both at home and in the work place. I’ve worked for women who thought that they had to be bullies with their employees to force their respect. In reality, a more nurturing approach to leadership would probably be much more effective. This, of course, depends upon the situation, but from my experience being a bully or a jerk is a poor way to behave as a boss regardless of your gender. People tend to produce more and go the extra mile when they feel respected and appreciated. In addition, a woman who is not willing to let go of control at home and give her man space to take the lead, deprives herself of the opportunity for him to take care of her. Yes, in modern times we still need to respect our masculine and feminine energies and allow each other to exert what comes naturally to us.

Artwork by Melissa Garrett

Artwork by Melissa Garrett

Finding Balance

Consider how the masculine and feminine energies work in your life... Honor and appreciate how they make you more dimensional and help you connect with others on a deeper level, or be more assertive. Through awareness you can find a beautiful balance between them that will serve you well. We are all a work in progress and the more that we learn about ourselves, the better that we can relate to our loved ones, our friends, our coworkers and other people in general. Embrace your masculine and your feminine energies. Honor how they work within you. Also find a partner who honors your energies and their own, someone who respects you as an equal and beautifully matches your energy. Together you can spiral upward in love and create an amazing life!

Wishing you balance, love and blessings,


P.S. - Being aware of the masculine and feminine energies within us all is the first step in understanding and relating to others, especially with your significant partner. In our next blog we will talk about the importance of knowing the subtle art of effectively communicating with our partners. Words have enormous power to bring us closer together or drive us further apart. You won't want to miss this blog post.

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