Why Do We Self Destruct at Each Roadblock in Life?

Why do we self destruct and sabotage ourselves when we hit roadblocks in life? 

The answer has two parts: ego and fear. Roadblocks are merely obstacles that lead us on a better path in life. We may be forced to pause or slow down exponentially, but what if that roadblock saves us from going over a cliff? Trust yourself and never give up on the map you draw that leads to your true purpose, your goals and your dreams. Maybe the roadblock is putting you on a better path? Perhaps it is there so that the Universe can show you things and new people along your way? Ponder these questions and know that your life holds a divine plan that is being revealed to you along your spiritual path. Ego is there to protect us, but sometimes too much fear overcomes us and stops us from pursuing our destiny and then we feel conflicted. 

  We all hit a wall sooner or later where we feel stuck and do not understand what we need to do to move forward. As my guru taught me, "live in the question." What does that even mean anyway? Well, observe free from judgement. All of the answers you seek are within you. Trust yourself and trust the journey. 

We all hit a wall sooner or later where we feel stuck and do not understand what we need to do to move forward. As my guru taught me, "live in the question." What does that even mean anyway? Well, observe free from judgement. All of the answers you seek are within you. Trust yourself and trust the journey. 

My Latest Roadblock

I have learned through yoga and meditation that we are in control of very little in reality. We can make healthy decisions and try our best, but occassionally outside circumstances throw up roadblocks that cause anxiety and heartache. For me, one of the biggest challenges was when my son went through a big health scare. At the age of nine he suddenly had terrible headaches, sometimes with audible and visual disturbances, and even siezures. We found a fabulous neurologist at Cincinnati Children’s Hospital who ordered an MRI. The findings were devastating to us. He discovered a neoplasm, an abnormal group of cells characteristic of cancer. Hello, massive roadblock in my entire family's life. There was a possibility that Corwin had brain cancer. I have never been more grateful to have yoga in my life than at that very anxious time. Although I was scared and sad, I used the tools that I had from my yoga practice (both on and off the mat) to breathe, stay positive and take it one day at a time. We ended up treating my son for migraines to manage the pain and followed up with another MRI a couple months later. The neoplasm was still present in the thalamus, but our doctor was happy that it had not grown. A couple months later his symptoms went away and we concluded it was all OK as a brain tumor would have progressed quickly with worsening problems. After four years his symptoms have recently returned. Again, another roadblock. We followed up with an MRI and the neoplasm was still present, however, it was smaller this time. So again, we are treating for him for migraines and are now calling it a "spot" to remove the scary title of neoplasm. Everything happens for a reason. Maybe this scare is in our lives to remind us to appreciate each and every day, to eat a little better and to improve our habits. I did not take a different path, I did not give up my dream of helping others. I paused and forged forward with new hope and a desire to live each day more deeply, fully appreciating my loved ones and the many blessings in my life.  

  Life is a dance. Sometimes it is two steps forward and one step back. Keep dancing even in hard times. Trust the rhythm of your life. Photo courtesy of Michaela Miller and  Rooted Yoga.

Life is a dance. Sometimes it is two steps forward and one step back. Keep dancing even in hard times. Trust the rhythm of your life. Photo courtesy of Michaela Miller and Rooted Yoga.

For the day we accept that we have chosen to choose our choices is the day we cast off the shackles of victimhood and are set free to pursue the lives we were born to live.
— The Rhythm of Life, by Matthew Kelly

How to Move Forward Visualizing Your Destination

Moving forward at times takes trust and great faith. It also asks that we believe in ourselves. Visualize what you want in life. Now imagine yourself already accomplishing your dreams. See yourself at the other end of your map and take in that wonderful feeling of accomplishment. Many people become destructive when they hit a roadblock turning in the wrong direction toward substance abuse, procrastination, overeating and other addictions. These substances numb us from our pain, but in the long run they can lead to a downward spiral and rob us of our joy. Instead, give yourself permission to slow down. Allow yourself to believe and deeply know that you are worth it even in hard times. In a crisis it is important to be super compassionate toward yourself. And remember, some things may not work out in life because something better is coming your way. If that is the case, slow down and pause and then trust your journey as you travel forward. We do not need to understand everything. We just need to be aware, accept what is and continue with positive momentum. A roadblock may redirect us, but it does not prevent us from reaching our goals and destinations.

  No one can fix things for us. And we cannot fix things for others. Practice the pause and learn to slow down so that you speak intentionally and learn to control your responses. 

No one can fix things for us. And we cannot fix things for others. Practice the pause and learn to slow down so that you speak intentionally and learn to control your responses. 

Overcoming Roadblocks

To overcome the roadblocks in your life, it is import for you to fuel yourself with healthy food, movement, meditation, supportive friends and family, and self help books such as the one that I will be reviewing at the end of this month called, "The Rhythm of Life" by Mathew Kelly. You are destined for greatness as long as you pursue your passions in a compassionate way being careful to honor and respect those you come into contact with along the way. Your ONLY competition is who you were the day before. Learn from mistakes, love and accept yourself where you land each day, and forgive yourself especially if it takes a lot longer than you expected to arrive at your destination. Meanwhile, laugh through the chaos and know that the fun is in the journey itself more than the destination point. 

Your Friend,

Libby

P.S. -  Books can be an excellent source of hope and inspiration as can coming together as a community. Paul & I would like to invite you to our online book club! We choose a book each month and write a short blog and open it up for discussion. This month I am reviewing the book I referred to in this blog, "The Rhythm of Life," by Matthew Kelly. It may well be one of the best books that I have ever read and I look forward to hearing what you think of it as well. 

  Sometimes Roadblocks are necessary for healing to take place. Be respectful and Patient knowing that healing brings new growth. This roadblock is on historic columbia River Highway in oregon at Multnomah Falls. Last summer a forest fire devastaTED THIS SCENIC AREA. MUCH OF THE HIGHWAY IS currently CLOSED TO PEOPLE WHILE NATURE HEALS herSELF.

Sometimes Roadblocks are necessary for healing to take place. Be respectful and Patient knowing that healing brings new growth. This roadblock is on historic columbia River Highway in oregon at Multnomah Falls. Last summer a forest fire devastaTED THIS SCENIC AREA. MUCH OF THE HIGHWAY IS currently CLOSED TO PEOPLE WHILE NATURE HEALS herSELF.


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